I'm back from New Orleans. It was not always enjoyable, per se, but I managed my health and my emotions like a DBT pro. As expected, my fears, sensitivities, intrusive thoughts, and self-judgments followed me down to Louisiana. And they didn't take over. YAY! I am proud of myself. All the work I've been doing at home paid off.
I also got to experience a more confident, self-assured persona of me. That was neat. It didn't feel like an act (like customer service can). Rather, it felt like the real me finally coming to the surface and interacting in the world.
Now, it wasn't all rainbows and unicorns. There were rainbows - lots of pride apparel and accessories. No unicorns. There were aggressive looking pelicans since all 16,000 of us gathered each evening at the Smoothie King Center, home of the New Orleans Pelicans basketball team. Those large, loud, indoor, crazy lighting evenings were hard for me to sit through. Plus I am sensitive to the wording of worship songs. The way in which I practice my faith is different than when I was in high school. I noticed I had strong opinions, and then would begin to self-invalidate myself for those. When the basketball arena evenings got to be too much, I choose to go back to the hotel rather than "tough it out". That was wise-minded of me. It was also a challenge to make sure I got enough to eat, drink, sleep, and chill each day. I think I did fairly well, though.
I have more to say about the Gathering, but this is all I feel like writing tonight.
I did catch a strain of covid, so I am going to eat ice cream and watch an ER reality tv show.
Later, my rainbow-pelicans.
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